Self-Esteem
Author: Sherri Schaefer

Self-Esteem is defined as confidence in yourself as an individual. To esteem anything is to consider it positively and hold it in high regard.

The decision to have good self-esteem is a personal choice and is yours alone. There will always be someone out there ready and willing to say negative things about you. The things that they say may or may not be true. Because of this, you cannot let your self-worth be determined by others. Take responsibility for the way you feel about yourself.

You can build-up your self-esteem by building up yourself. Identify the things you like and that are good about you. What are the things that you do well? Focus on developing these positive traits. Smile at yourself in the mirror as you would your lover or your best friend. When you speak to yourself be encouraging and supportive. Take care of yourself as if you are the most important thing in your life because you are.

The truth goes a long way towards creating self-esteem. Truth is based on fact or reality. Your body knows when you lie or when you are faking it. You feel fear (of being found out), and you lose faith in yourself. As a result, your self-esteem plummets. When you tell the truth, it resonates within you, and you feel solid and grounded. There is no fear or defensiveness. You are simply who you are.

More often than not, we treat ourselves worse than others do. Allow yourself to make mistakes without beating yourself up about them. Mistakes are the result of an incorrect act or decision. They are not part of who you are. If you make a mistake, just start from where you are, and make another choice based on the options available to you.

Sometimes we win, and sometime we lose. So what? If you have self-respect, you simply accept yourself as you are, and like yourself for being that way. This acceptance is not contingent on success or failure. You are still the same person today that you were yesterday and that you will be tomorrow. Outcomes should not influence how you feel about yourself.

Perfectionism can cause you to expect too much from yourself and others. People with this personality trait worry obsessively and fear error. This emotional stress can lead to low self-esteem when you feel as though you keep falling short, never seem to get things right, never have enough time to do your best, are self-conscious, and feel criticized by others. You end up feeling bad. Nothing on earth is perfect so you are fighting a losing battle if you are trying to achieve this. Focus on doing things right (not perfect) so that you are satisfied with the results. Your body knows when something is right – something clicks inside, and there is no fear. When you do something right, you are not afraid to finish it or turn the results over to another person. It is good to give your best effort, go the extra mile, and take pride in your performance just don’t make “perfect” your goal because it is not attainable.

When you doubt yourself, you make your own failure certain by getting what you expect. By contrast, if you have confidence in yourself and believe that you will succeed, you will. Your mind and subconscious seeks to complete whatever you are thinking so whatever you have on your mind is what your subconscious will work towards.

In Summary:

1. Have confidence in yourself as an individual.
2. Hold yourself in high regard.
3. Take responsibility for how you feel about yourself.
4. Don’t let others influence you.
5. Focus on developing your positive traits.
6. Speak the truth.
7. Allow yourself to make mistakes.
8. Make choices.
9. Accept who you are.
10. Be yourself.
11. Focus on doing things right.
12. Finish what you start.
13. Have confidence in yourself.
14. Expect the best.






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Sherri Schaefer is a freelance writer. She can be reached at NellisOne@msn.com.

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