From Transition to Triumph
Author: Tom Laughlin

Each day brings new challenges that force you to make adjustments to your life. You usually minimize the disruption by making changes that allow you to keep your daily routines and structures intact. I propose that some challenges can be more than just unwelcome interruptions. They can be the seeds of personal transformation.

A client of mine owns a business that had been very successful until recently. Changes in the business climate significantly decreased his net worth and put his business into the red for the first time since he bought it almost 20 years ago. Rather than minimize the impact of this challenge he took the opportunity to transform his life. He downsized his business and consolidated his personal assets. He reconnected with his family and friends, and spent more time at his cabin on the lake. Rather than fighting the change he leaned into it and made room in his life for more important things.

Let's look at how you can transform your life.

HAVE A VISION

1) Create a clear personal vision. You must look into the future and see not only what you wish to have but who you wish to be. Do you wish to be an educator, a grandparent, or part of the clergy at your church? Your vision will act as a guide as you adjust the course of your life and make choices. The client I referenced earlier is a business owner now but has a vision of himself as a grandparent, golfer, and relaxed retiree at his cabin on the lake.

2) Base your vision on your own authentic values. You have adopted many values from parents, teachers, peers, and institutions. You must connect with your own authentic values for your vision to lead you to a better life. Take Barbara Winter author of “Making a Living Without a Job”. She turned away from a secure job as a teacher to reconnect with her childhood dream of a glamorous career, exotic travel, and sophisticated friends. She followed her own authentic values to transform herself into a best selling author and public speaker who travels the world inspiring others to take the path of entrepreneurship.

3) See the purpose of the present through your vision of the future. A clear vision not only helps you face your fears and make sacrifices, it helps you see purpose in your struggle. Victor Frankl says he survived a concentration camp during World War II because he believed the experience would teach him how to help others understand the meaning of life. He endured because his suffering had purpose.

4) Keep the end in mind. Life is full of changes but not all of them are opportunities for transformation. You can’t transform yourself every time you face a challenge. Use your vision as a guide to choose which challenges to leverage into transformation.

5) Be prepared. You must prepare to act before opportunities present themselves. You may need more education to make a career change or savings to buy that perfect piece of land. If you wait until the opportunity arrives to prepare you may miss the chance.


MANAGE THE TRANSITION

1) Get plenty of rest. Exhaustion is a classic side effect of transition. Your unconscious mind processes change in dreams and during a significant transition you dream so intensely that you get very little rest. In the midst of all this unconscious workaholism it is important to take it easy on yourself. Naps are not a sin!

2) Create a transition routine. Disruption in your routine not only makes you feel lost but prevents you from taking care of yourself. Routines help you regulate your sleep, food intake, and many other vital aspects of your life. Make sure you create new routines to keep you rested and healthy.

3) Talk to people who will listen and empathize. Ghalid, an ancient Indian poet, said it best, “What kind of friendship is this when friends give advice? I wish they knew healing or simple, ordinary sympathy.”

4) Lean on people who care about you. Many times you isolate yourself because you do not want to be a burden to others. In reality, what feels like a ten-ton weight on your shoulders is as light as a feather for others to bear. Let your family and friends help you.

5) Find experienced guides. William Bridges’ book "Transitions" is a wonderful guide for the transition process. There are also books, programs, and counselors who specialize in career transition, grief processing, divorce, etc. Take advantage of them.

Our culture values speed and certainty above all else but transformations take time and are filled with doubt. Personal transformation requires patience, faith, and a clear sense of who you want to be. Then and only then can you turn transition into triumph.






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Tom Laughlin is president of Caravela Inc., an international leadership and team development consultancy based in Minneapolis Minnesota. He can be reached at (763) 268-0984 or tom@caravela.us.

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