Watch How You Speak
Author: Bill Ferguson

When you were born, you were a full expression of love, but you knew nothing about the physical universe. You then began the exciting adventure of discovering life.

As life unfolded, you made decisions about the way life is. You made decisions like, "I’m creative" and "I like myself." You also made decisions like "relationships don’t work" and "life is hard."

You thought you were discovering the truth of life, but you weren’t. You were only deciding the truth for you.

These decisions, or points of view, then became like a computer program. They determined how you view life and how you interact with the world around you. You automatically act consistent with the way you "know" life is.

Your life then becomes consistent with your points of view.

If you know that relationships don’t work, you will quit when the going gets tough. Why bother to put out the effort when you know that relationships don’t work anyway?

If you know that life is hard, you will expect effort and struggle. You won’t have the ability or the desire to take the action necessary to have life be effortless.

Likewise, if you know that you like yourself, you will seldom invalidate or criticize yourself. You will speak well of yourself and then like yourself even more.

As life proves your points of view to be correct, you become more and more convinced that you know the truth of life. This keeps you from discovering that your life is your own creation.

You create your life by the points of view you adopt. Some points of view forward you. Others do tremendous damage.

To have life be as wonderful as possible, you need to create a reality that supports you. Keep the points of view that forward you and release the ones that don’t.

What are the points of view that sabotage your life?

What have you decided is the truth about relationships, about love, about life? What is the truth about you?


List every negative point of view you can find.

Here are some examples: "I can’t handle money. Relationships don’t last. I’m not good enough. I hate to exercise. You can’t trust a man, or a woman. You have to fight to survive. Life is hard."

To release a negative point of view, all you have to do is say, "This is no longer true for me. I let go of this point of view." Say this and mean it.

Sometimes this is much easier said than done. Sometimes we don’t want to let go of a point of view. This is true even when the point of view clearly sabotages us.

We hang on to certain points of view like we hang on to people. We hang on to protect ourselves. We hang on so we don’t have to face something inside ourselves.

What negative points of view do you hang on to?

If you have resistance to releasing a negative point of view, find what the resistance is. What would you have to confront or experience if you could no longer have the point of view?

What is the hurt, the feelings or emotions that you are avoiding? What do you fear will happen? What will you have to face? What will you have to be responsible for? What will you have to confront about yourself?

Here are the steps to release a negative point of view.

1. Find the specific wording of your point of view. Keep the wording simple.

2. Notice that your point of view is not the "truth of the universe," just your truth.

3. Notice if you have any resistance to letting it go.

4. If you have resistance, find what the specific resistance is. What are you avoiding by hanging on to your negative point of view?

5. Work with each item of resistance until the resistance is gone.

6. Let go of the point of view. Say to yourself, "This is no longer the truth for me. I let the point of view go."

7. Find a replacement point of view that will forward you in your life.

Continue to work with your negative points of view until you are free of every one of them.

Then go through your life searching for more. The best way to do this is to listen to your conversations. When you talk, your negative points of view will slip out. Whenever you make a statement that says life is a particular way, remember that this is just your point of view. If the point of view forwards you, keep it. If the point of view sabotages you, let it go.

Let go of all the negative points of view you have, and don’t create new ones.

Be particularly careful when you are upset. Most negative points of view are created in the moment of an upset. When you are upset, you relate very negatively to your situation. The points of view you adopt in an upset will almost always sabotage you.

When you get upset, instead of making another negative decision, like "Robert is a jerk," say something like this, "Robert seems to be a jerk, but I’m upset and I don’t know for sure."

Also, be very careful how you speak. The more you speak negatively about something, the more that negative statement becomes your point of view. That area of your life then becomes consistent with the way you say it is.

Look at the areas of your life that don’t work and notice how you speak about them. You speak very negatively. You speak your unworkability into existence.

When you speak negatively about something, you lose your power. You convince yourself that you have nothing to do with the problem. You put yourself at the effect of your situation and lose your ability to take action.

So don’t speak negatively about anything. Don’t speak negatively about yourself, about others or about your life, unless you want what you say to be true.

Every word you say is a prayer.

We go through life saying, "I don’t have any, I don’t have any, I don’t have any." Then we stop and pray, asking, "Please, God, send me some." Then we go on saying, "I don’t have any, I don’t have any," and we wonder why our prayers don’t get answered.

Well, our prayers do get answered. We’re just careless about the way we pray

So watch what you say. You create your life by the way you say life is. If you want to have life be great, don’t speak negatively. Look for the beauty and opportunity in everything.

This article was taken from the book, Miracles Are Guaranteed








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Bill Ferguson has been featured on The Oprah Winfrey Show and on hundreds of radio and television talk shows across the country. He has led over 2,500 workshops and has worked with thousands of people. His books, How To Heal A Painful Relationship, Heal The Hurt That Runs Your Life and Miracles are Guaranteed, have become best-sellers. He presently leads workshops in the Houston area and does individual consulting by telephone. He can be reached at (713) 520-5370 or on the internet at http://www.effectiveliving.com.

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